Sekejap

Again, I was lucky to be upright and functioning this morning at Shah Alam court. Two nights prior a friend invited me to second chair for a case involving a restoration of a vintage piece of equipment by an expert. So last night I went to take a quick look at the cause papers and the documents to form a first impression of the matter. The owner claimed there was a guarantee given by the expert on time it would take, the expert said it was an estimate subject to payments and availability of replacement parts requested by the owner. The owner took his sweet time to make payments and yet expected fast results. When the restoration took longer than first estimated the owner cried, Fraud! and proceeded to file a legal suit against the expert. Mind you this is no mass produced junk being restored and yet the owner dared to expect a beautiful result in a short span of time and at minimal costs. As for me, in between catching up with the said friend, throwing around possible ideas for trial, that quick look lasted until the wee hours. Oh well, I got time.

Time.

Then on my drive back from Shah Alam Court, there was a discussion on the radio about Henry David Thoreau’s piece about walking. Being an unrepentant walker forced to work at the pace of fossil fuel driven madness this piqued my interest. It was said that walking is the most democratic activity one can indulge in. Everyone walks to certain extent be you a commoner as I am or some other hoity-toity titled entity. Sure walking takes time but that is the whole point. To take the time. I can confirm that most of my problems can be solved and have been solved by walking. It was that time between crossing streets and dodging puddles that allows my brain to make connections from two seemingly separate things or ideas. Solvitur Ambulando indeed. I ought to walk more. I used to walk a lot.

Speaking of walking and time, two days before, I went for a long walk at the local park with my youngest to get him some away time from screens (damned screens) and to look at greeneries and things. Something I noticed about public parks is that the people of working age are always either jogging or running with the look of ticking off an item from their mental to-do list in their eyes as if already thinking of things to do next after the jog while the old if they move at all, moved at a deliberate pace (early morning tai chi), slow walk on the pebbly strewn reflexology path. Unhurried, not pressed for time. Enjoying themselves. Whereas the very young switches between sudden bursts of energy at the playground to slow observation of all the wonders a park can offer. Why does taking time have to be the province of the retired and the very young? Why can’t us the working adults do the same? What’s the rush?

George Mac Donald, a friend of Lewis Carroll and one of the earliest pioneers of fantasy fiction once wrote:

"Certainly work is not always required of a man. There is such a thing as a sacred idleness, the cultivation of which is now fearfully neglected" 

When I first read that quote I was thumping the table in agreement and exclaiming By God, the man speaks the truth! (It is). Mind you this quote dates to 1870 where steam engines are an indispensable assets to all manner of industries which in turn spawned a frenzy of productivity and expansion (stim dowh). At that time Marx was working on the 2nd volume of Das Kapital, Scramble for Africa is but 10 years away and mechanization already had people working, working and working like mad. Perhaps, George Mac Donald was reminiscing on the days before steam, before the madness for capital and productivity. So, it is not really a modern problem after all, this rushing about here and there.

For me idleness is that it is that time between things where you just switch off for a bit. That bit where you live your life and feel alive, between trying to make a living and staying alive. That small bit (should be bigger anyways). That sunny, peaceful valley in between the mountains of madness of our daily life. It is there, we just have to find it. We just have to take the time for it.

I am trying to not make this a rail about the dangers of modern life but it seems that taking time has been taken for granted. Considered to be an old-fashioned thing, unproductive, even. To rush is productive, to run like hell is good, to be busy is to be looked upon favourably but where are we rushing off to, really?

During lunchtime, I came across an article from The Atlantic about procrastination being a productive state of being in terms of creative works. The said article was entitled The Antidote to the Cult of Self Discipline. Despite of its title it was more on the need to take time in order to create something beautiful rather than a rail against self discipline. Ok-lah, a rail it was but against productivity rather than against self-discipline. Of course there were references made to works done in defiance of the office hours and what constitutes as productive use of time but this line in particular caught my eye:

‘’ … it’s the strange mental collisions between the thinking mind and the wandering mind that yield the most interesting results. These are the moments when artistry sneaks in unbidden; Annabel understands that if art is created out of life, the latter has to have space to happen.’’

To this I wholeheartedly agree and say that it extends beyond creation of arts or artistry. It is not procrastination either. Rather, it is the time for ideas and thoughts to gel together. Besides, who or where was it said that we human beings do not learn from absorbing information. We learn from reflecting on things. Making connection from what we have absorbed with what we have experienced. Just like walking, that too, takes time.

If time is one of the natural order of things, then to take time is surely in accordance with nature.

Doughs need time for the yeast to do its magic, a chili plant even with fertilizers would need time to bear fruit. We still need time to rest and sleep to perform optimally for despite all the energy drinks and stimulants in the world nothing can ever compare to a good nights sleep and to be sure, there is a world of difference between an instant maggi asam laksa and lovingly crafted actual asam laksa. One is survival food, the other, soul food. And we ate far too many maggi asam laksa. We feed our body but forget to nourish our soul, thinking that accumulation of more and the quicker in the doing is better. Is it, really?

To be good, to produce good things is to take your time. Yet, we push ourselves pedal to the metal almost everyday in the name of productivity that taking your time is almost a dirty word. Is it any wonder that we are a society rife with anxieties, depression and all sorts of other mental and emotional issues. Nowadays, we know the value of time, we calculate it obsessively and bemoan its lack in terms of productivity but not of its meaning in relation to Life as a whole. Waiting, is for losers, Patience is a long-lost word. We have forgotten its meaning and somewhere along the way we drank the sirap (or Koolaid if you prefer it) of modernity and have joined the cult of speed.

Slow down.

Give a hug, a kiss, dance a slow dance with no music on. Invest in a full-on tickling contest with your kids. Build that Lego set with your kid. Walk or even run in the rain deliberately. A long walk in the morning or in the evening. Enjoy the sunrise or sunset. Sit on a park bench and observe people going by, observe from the smallest to the biggest of insects flying and crawling around. Be still. Take a deep breath. Take a break. Take a moment to distance yourself from the matter at hand. From your problem. From work. Let the world spin on while we just sit there, alive and yet not an active participant. Merely absorbing the world around us from our senses. Savouring the fact that we are alive, one of millions on this planet with our own dreams and expectations.

Surely, we have the time for that, while we are still alive.

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Mengantuk

There was a time when two straight days of  sleeping after 3 am is nothing. I could still function normally. Nowadays, two days of sleeping late would need at least a week of extra sleep for me to recover else I’d be nothing but a zombie. Upright but not functioning. Not fit company for man or beast. Last time it happened I had a blank spot in my memory. One minute I was drafting something on my laptop then the next thing I knew, I was driving to Shah Alam court. I could not recall what happened in between the two. Today almost turned out the same way.

Last night I was catching up with work that somehow stretched out until the wee hours. Last night was the second consecutive day of going home terribly late. Thankfully I had a friend over to keep me company while we both work on our respective files. Slowly, in between tea, dinner and supper we chipped away at tasks which at first seemed mountainous. Somewhere in the middle a universe has its balance restored, souls were saved from eternal damnation and things were struck off a to-do list. 

Being engrossed with work I forgot until around 2 am that I had court matter this morning. A very light bankruptcy matter. We had to amend our Request for the issuance of Bankruptcy Notice because of a small defect. The funny thing is, the Bankruptcy Notice was issued anyway by the court. So in the interest of keeping things shipshape we filed an amendment application for the Request for the issuance of Bankruptcy Notice. I was sleepy, so sleepy that it was a miracle I arrived in court at all. I registered my attendance at the kiosk but did not look for a seat for me to wait. I dare not sit down for fear of falling asleep and missing my turn when my case number is called in that mechanical voice. It was that bad. I went to the men’s room to splash some water on my face. That kept me alert for a few minutes. So I paced to and fro hoping that by constantly moving I can keep sleep at bay. It worked. 

The thing about pacing around the room of got me thinking of how some things never change. The carpeting that was around since I was a pupil and still comfortingly ugly. The seating and the same faces (ok, some of them) I’ve seen seated upon them. Well the metal benches were fairly new. I think. The same with the kiosk where you key in your attendance. I could not remember how it was before the kiosks were around save one particular period between before the kiosks came into the picture and the old system where it was free for all, utter chaos where you had to write your name on the list pasted outside the respective rooms, line up to wait for your turn in accordance to some order agreed upon by all. Sometimes lawyers would find a way to cut the queue with whatever excuse, genuine or otherwise. Usually, I would skip the lining up altogether and come in at a time I judge to be not too late to be invite reprimand and yet not too early to have me stuck in a long queue like the rest of the debt recovery lawyers. If I get paid for every minute I spent on waiting, I would have had my own yacht by now.

Then my case number was called, which was surprising. It was not a long wait and it cut short my reverie. 

The cute Penolong Kanan Pendaftar looked like she could use a few more hours of sleep. As for myself, I can almost feel my rational brain leaking out of me as I sank into that soft seat. Sleep. Blessed long sleep. I could use one right about then. I felt a yawn coming. A big one. Yawns are contagious. You can tell who is looking at you in a crowded place by faking a yawn. If someone else is yawning immediately after you, chances are he or she is looking at you for whatever reason. But I must not yawn, not in front of the PKP. So I made that face where you are trying hard to suppress a yawn but to hell with it lets just yawn but discreetly and without opening your mouth. Then I saw the PKP doing the same but in a more ladylike manner. Like I said, contagious. 

-Uhh Dengan izin Puan, I began to cut short any other collective displays of sleep deprivation. I explained the reason for me being before her, the defect and the application made to remedy the potential defect only to have the PKP stare at me unblinking. A few seconds passes before she asked: JD (Judgment Debtor) hadir tak?

-Uhh, saya cuba panggil Puan I said unthinking as I rose and walked to the door intending to call out the JD’s name as was the custom  before remembering there was no need to do so. I turned and sat right back down. The PKP looked at me, puzzled and sleepy.

-Puan, kami sedari kekhilafan di dalam Permintaan untuk Mengeluarkan Notis Kebankrapan sebelum sebarang cubaan serahan kertas kausa dibuat kepada JD. Saya tidak rasa JD akan hadir pada pagi ini.

-Jadi Puan, saya dengan rendah diri memohon untuk kebenaran diberikan bagi kami membuat pindaan bagi kekhilafan yang berlaku. 

-Uhh, counsel, you have to make a formal application and not oral application like this.

It was my turn then to stare unblinking at the PKP. Man, she really needs more than a few hours of sleep. She needs it more than I do. 

-Puan,kami telah memfailkan permohonan untuk meminda yang mana telah ditetapkan untuk pendengaran pada pagi ini.

-Ah, I see. Sebentar ya counsel, said the PKP no doubt trying to mentally slap her cheeks to keep herself awake and concentrate on the matter at hand. If she was embarrassed she gave no sign of it. She spent some time, I think, scrolling through the cause papers filed. I kept my gaze down afterwards, pretending to writing things on my court minute, trying to suppress a smile at the minor confusion. It happens, even to the best of us when we lack sleep. 

Cause papers in order, I thanked the PKP and left the room and let out a big yawn. To hell with the lawyers waiting for their turn. They all look like they could use an hour or more of sleep. 

Don’t we all?

I didn’t check if there were any follow up yawns coming from the thinning crowd. I was going to get me some sleep. A good, long sleep. 

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Mak

 

Where do I even begin.

Mak pernah cakap dengan aku dulu, Hidup ni umpama tayar. Kadang-kadang di atas. Kadang-kadang di bawah. Bila dah tua bangka ni baru faham maksudnya apa. Menang bukan selalu, kalah bukan selamanya. Hidup ada cara untuk buat kau rasa humbled bila perlu dan memberi motivasi untuk terus berjalan tatkala kau rasa kena hempuk bertalu-talu dengan nasib tak baik. 

Macam itulah kut kehidupan Mak. Dia bukan datang dari keluarga senang. Susah sangat pun tak jugak. Middle class la kut. Arwah Atuk dulu kerja dengan British Army, jadi Chief Clerk katanya sampai disiplin ketat tu dibawak balik ke rumah. Memang patut pun. Adik beradik mak ramai. Dia antara paling muda. Belajar pun bukan jurusan professional. Tapi pelajaran Mak paling besar bukan dari universiti. Ayat klisenya mak belajar dari kehidupan, lebih tepat lagi kehidupan lepas universiti. Dan kehidupan Mak  banyak mengajar aku.

Mak banyak kali disalahanggap sebagai seorang peguam. Satu, from time to time dia akan pakai hitam putih bila pegi kerja dan lagi satu dan paling penting, dia tak takut dengan sesiapa. Dia nampak ada yang tak kena pada tempatnya, benda tak betul, memang dia akan tegur, memang dia akan bebel. Dia akan gaduh(mulut) kalau perlu. Berdarah la telinga, tersiat-siatlah ego kau kalau kena. Itu satu skill tak turun sepenuhnya pada aku. Aku man of peace. Most of the time-lah. 

Masa muda, baru berkahwin, Mak dengan Abah rajin mengumpul majalah National Geographic. Majalah berkulit kuning inilah yang menjadi tingkap pertama aku pada dunia. Bila Mak meningkat usia dia mula baca buku-buku Stephen Covey. Malcom Gladwell. Jenis-jenis buku macam tu. Buku self-help. Cerita pasal manusia, pasal cemana nak lengkapkan diri, baiki diri untuk menghadapi perangai manusia, nak menghadapi dunia. Agaknya dari situ aku pun mula minat menelaah pasal falsafah. Iyalah, falsafah ini pun berkisar tentang manusia, perangai manusia dan kehidupan. Sekarang bila dah tua Mak rajin menyelak buku agama, fikir pasal di Sana nanti pula. 

Mak memang sayangkan kami adik-beradik. Makan pakai semua cukup, tak kiralah waktu dia suri rumah sepenuh masa atau bila dia mula bekerja semula. Makan semua dia masak from scratch. The kind of food that sticks to your bones. Takde maknanya benda-benda instant ni. Aku cuma aktif makan megi bila dah masuk universiti. Kalau Mak masak, memang bertambah-tambah nasik. Bila di Kedah, aku rindu sambal tempe ikan bilis dia. Kadang-kadang sampai call tanya harini masak apa. Pastu kena bebel: tanya masak apa bukan boleh makan pun dia cakap. Aku balik dari Kedah kurus (ini bukan mitos) sampai ada sepupu tanya aku isap dadah ke. 

Itu, satu lagi skill dia yang tak turun pada aku. Memasak. Padahal itu survival skill penting tiap lelaki kena ada selepas menjahit. Takat goreng telur, nasik goreng cincai boleh lah. Tapi nak memasak sampai ramuan tu main agak-agak je campak tapi sedap menjadi, itu memang bukan kepakaran aku. Aku bukan Mak. 

Dia pernah kata dahulu, my children are my life. Dengan siapa sahaja dia tak bergaduh demi kami adik-beradik. Apa saja mak tak buat untuk besar kan kami. Sampaikan aku rasa dia betul-betul mula menikmati hidup ini bila kami dah besar panjang pasal dia sentiasa ada dengan kami. Sentiasa. Tapi iyalah, bila meningkat remaja, membesar mula lah nak melawan, little shits that we were. Konon nak melebar sayap. 

Dari masa ke semasa ada juga aku jenguk, bawak cucu-cucu dia buat teman kasi senyum tengok gelagat dua hero. Tapi tak selalu. Aku pun tak pasti kenapa. Sebenarnya tak ada alasan untuk aku tak luangkan masa dia sebagaimana dia banyak habiskan masa dengan kami waktu kecik dulu. Aku bukan kerja 9 to 5 pun. Aku bukan answerable pada sesiapa kecuali pada client. Entahlah. Mungkin kerana banyak titi-titi yang roboh tak boleh diseberangi kembali, simpang diambil yang tak boleh berpatah balik. 

Boleh jadi juga itu hanya alasan. Aku harap esok hari aku tak kena menjawab kenapa aku tak luangkan masa dengan dia masa dia masih ada. 

Baru baru ini hari lahir Mak. Dia hantar WhatsApp pada anak menantu pesan tentang akhirat. Pesan tentang rapuhnya kebergantungan pada manusia itu. People will fail you. Sometimes inadvertently. Sometimes deliberately. Kat situ aku tau Mak memang cakap dari pengalaman sendiri. A number of people failed Mak. If I am honest with myself, I might even count myself as one of them, inadvertently. Aku manusia, tak sempurna. Mak pun sama walaupun bagi aku dia the only superwoman in the world sebab lalui apa yang dia lalui untuk besarkan kami. Alhamdulillah jadi la juga orang kami adik beradik ni. 

Mak adalah produk generasi dia jadi sememangnya ada benda yang Mak dan aku tak sependapat. Tapi tak sependapat macam mana pun dia Mak aku. One and only. 

Kehidupan Mak ajar aku bahawa hidup tak adil tapi itu bukan alasan untuk kau tak berlaku adil pada orang lain. Mak ajar aku untuk take no shit from no one, untuk terus melawan dan terus melawan. Mak juga ajar bahawa a good pair of shoes are the best investment one can make. Dari Mak juga aku belajar untuk jangan harapkan orang untuk tolong kau kalau kau sendiri tak cuba tolong diri kau sendiri, bahawa sesungguhnya tak ada alasan untuk tak belajar. That everything and everyone is a lesson for you.

Aku tak tahu macam mana kehidupan bila Mak tak ada nanti. Kerana Mak sentiasa ada. That one constant in my life bila semua benda kejap-kejap berubah. 

Mungkin itu pelajaran terakhir dari Mak. Final lesson on growing up. That one day she will no longer be around to guide me (and nag me). My first and greatest teacher. My north star.

My mother. 

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On Trades. Nothing owned, everything on Loan with interest to pay.

I lost my bands last Monday. It was one of the oldest relics of my pupillage. I remembered buying it at one of the stalls at the KL Court cafeteria (odd thing to be selling at a drinks stall) after an LA  where i read in chambers discovered that he had his robe but not his bands for a High Court hearing. I was at KL Court at that time obtaining JID's by the armload at one of the magistrate's court, the LA knew this. So he sent me an sms asking me to find a spare pair of bands post haste. So i did. 

It was nothing fancy. Just a polyester bands with velcro fasteners at the end instead of the usual bands on strings type. As a token of his gratitude for saving his (turkey) bacon the LA bought me a big McDonalds lunch. When asked about the band he said: Simpanlah. Saya dah jumpa saya punya terselit dalam kereta. Lagipun nanti awak mesti pakainya nanti. In the end it was a worthy trade for me. A big lunch for a cheap band that would later go around (most of) the peninsular with me. Later on i found out that you can rent the damned thing from the Bar Room for pittance. But of course it would be better to own one. 

Going back to last Monday, I was in hellfire rush to an appeal i was already late to (or so i thought) when i realized my bands were not where it was supposed to be. I was exactly where the aforementioned LA was years and years ago only there are no pupil for me to call upon. But it ended well. I got what i came for from the appeal but the price was a new pair of bands and the loss of an old one. A worthy trade?. It seems that way. 

Either way, it marked my ongoing passage from nowhere to somewhere.. Maybe one day, i will get There. 

I cannot truly own that win because many hands contributed to it to which i give thanks to, Hands of Fate is the first and obvious one, my colleagues, friends and mentors. But as aside, can one truly own anything really? Or is it just our desperate attempt to mark our brief presence here on this Earth. Our means of saying: i was here.  

Anyway, of course it felt weird using a new pair of bands in front of a  judge I have never appeared before in an area of law i am not familiar with but it was a transition of sorts, something old for something new and a reminder for me that bands, relationships and jobs, they don't last forever and that the two certain thing in Life is Change and Death. 

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On Investment Scams

 

Yesterday, the Friday khutbah was about looking for rezeki halal or gains made in the permissible way. In the Khutbah there was a vicious poke at online scammers on whether in the race to accumulate riches in fastest way possible it is rezeki halal (it is not). If it is in the khutbah then things are that bad.

This is not a khutbah. This is just a reflection of mine after having been involved in court cases stemming from scams. More specifically, investment scams. To be clear, I am not an expert on investment scams. I just happen to encounter them regularly for some reason.

 

A.     Scammers show and tell a good story, but not the whole story.

Here is a scenario for you to consider. A nephew who is known to be leeching off his aging parent’s income, no visible employment of what so ever. All the sudden a guy who is known to borrow Dad’s car brought home an expensive car (insert your preferred dream car here). Started to change the unshowered look for the well dressed look and talk about investments with relatives. Sembang crypto. Sembang puluh ribu. Sembang kencang.

Of course the earlier image of a deadbeat is hard to shed with relatives but one gullible uncle took a chance. After all, the investment is in Cryptocurrency and the deadbeat is the go to guy when it come to IT and cyber stuff. It ought to be a legitimate investment. It looks legit, there is a company website to monitor your investment. There is a physical office and the nephew even brought him to see one of the directors for heavens sake!. Confirm legit!

The gullible uncle starts to see the returns in three months time. Pump in RM 10,000.00 and get RM 5000.00 every month for 3 years. Guaranteed. Gullible uncle is now the perpetually smiling uncle. But then looking at the nephews new car the thought crossed his mind, He asked the nephew, how long has he been doing the investment? 6 months replied the nephew sheepishly.

The uncle did the maths. Impossible for the nephew to pump capital to get the kind of returns to afford the car. Even his parents could not raise that kind of capital being retired teachers. When pressed for details the nephew relented. Don’t tell anybody else. I made what I made from my downlines. For every downline I recruit I will get a certain sum every month. The more downlines I have, the more I can make in a month. Exit gullible uncle, enter greedy uncle. Wife, friends, surau members. All fair prospects. All happy, all swimming in money until one day the payments stops, the website went offline. The deadbeat went uncontactable, could not be located. Just plain gone. The physical office is now empty, unoccupied. Angry downlines began to chase after greedy uncle. Dreams of easy life turned into a nightmare. All because he took the bait. The expensive car being the bait. The seemingly to an extra cherry on top of an already profitable (scam) investment.

In a best case scenario the story ends with just loss of money and reputation for the greedy/gullible uncle. Worse case scenario, police reports are made, prosecution in criminal courts and civil suit by investor/downlines to follow.

This is a familiar old story. The difference would be the scam. It could be Palm Oil Investment in Thailand, Investing Coco Plantation in Gabon, Halal Hub investment with cryptocurrency baked into the deal, Insurance cum Investment Account or some Cryptocurrency scam belatedly riding on the already stale success stories of Bitcoin, or whatever. All the story had to do is to part you from your hard earned money. Greed will do the rest.

1.      It starts with Friends and Family

It always began with friends and family. Just like MLM schemes. But I find the middle aged to the elderly are more susceptible to investment scams than the younger generation. It could be because there are the ones with the money to spare. The young are hopelessly broke (okay, maybe not all). So if a friend you have not been in contact with for so long or a nephew or niece suddenly shows up with all the trappings of the newly rich and telling you that you can be like him or her too, beware. If not for yourself, for your aging parents or relatives.

 

2.      Too Good to be True.

Study the brochure or prospectus if there is one. There are bound to be something wrong with the actual document. Crappy printing. Typos. The investment product will sound something similar with a legitimate investment product except this one is better and more profitable (according to the scammer lah). All fluff words or grand promises of better returns than actual investments on the market which at first blush sounds too good to be true (because it is not true). If you are lucky there will be a comparison table. The emphasis will be solely on the profit and nary a word on the risk factor.  With that, it plays into the greed/ hope factor. Okay, maybe greed is too harsh of a word. Let us call it hope then. Hopes of expanding the college funds of one’s children. Hopes of building a bigger and better nest egg for the old age. Hopes of making extra money. Scams prey on that hope.  

 

3.      Consistent Returns, too consistent.

Another signs of a scam would be the consistent payout every month regardless of rumblings of war in Middle East, dropping oil prices, change of government in Malaysia. It would seem that real world happenings has no bearing at all on the investments. Share prices on the Bursa would rise or dip accordingly, the goings on on the Composite Index would affect your Unit Trust investment, even Crypto currencies values ebbed and flowed according to the latest news. Even periodic interest payments of bonds will rise and fall according to interest rates. But not this investment(scam). This investment (scam) impervious to harm. Or so you thought. There is one case where the victim received RM 5000 every month as the returns until the scam imploded at which point the victim received nothing but scorn from relatives who joined the investment at the victims insistence.  The point is, investment scams are immune to fluctuations and this is because they are not real investments rooted in the real world. They are as fake as China copy LV handbags.

 

4.      Short shelf life

From my observations, most scam investments will collapse within 3 years from the date money changed hands. So if in the course of convincing you to invest the number 3 years is thrown around, take care. It could be a scam. My theory is that the convoluted transaction of using Investor C to pay for Investor B’s monthly return while simultaneously using Investor A to pay for Investor D's monthly return creates a tangled web of deceit that will collapse on its own weight after a time. In one particular case the scammer wickedly proclaimed to the victims that their investments will mature at the end of 3 years after which the principle sum and the returns can be collected. By the time that 3 years is almost over the scammer had already milked what could be milked from the unsuspecting victims and are ready to disappear.

 

B.     Minimizing the risk

 

If its looks suspicious and sounds suspicious, check

If the alarm bells are ringing in your head about a proposed investment promising high and consistent yield, get independent verification whether it is the real deal. One way to do that is to go to this PDRM website and this Bank Negara website. The PDRM website is butt ugly but it allows you to check for scams by way of bank account number used, company name or telephone number used for all kinds of scams including investment scams. The Bank Negara Website is more basic but you will find what you are looking for, most of the time and, I consider the BNM list much authoritative since BNM is the body responsible to issue licenses for financial institutions including investment companies and such. So if BNM says it’s an investment scam, it is an investment scam. If the suspicious financial product being offered to you is listed on the Financial Consumer Alert List, kindly tell the scammer that you are not interested and do your duty as a citizen and lodge a police report. Who knows how many life savings and nest egg you will be saving.

Some, not all.

If you keep in mind Items 1 to 4 above, and still think a suspicious looking investment is not a scam and worth venturing into then no power on earth can stop you from investing but for God’s sake please just invest a small sum of your own money. Not your father's, not your mother's, not your aunt or uncle's, not your schoolmate's money. Invest (if you really insist on investing) the sum you are willing to lose. This will vary from a person to person It could be RM 100, could be RM 50,000. If you are not willing to lose any money then don’t invest. Remember the old saying of not putting all your eggs in one basket. Maybe an egg or two will do.

Downlines and investments to greater misery

Like I said, if you are still adamant on investing in a suspicious sounding investment, invest only your own money. Don’t volunteer to take up deposits for would be investor/victims. Don’t fall for the recruitment aspect of the scam investments promising more returns for more recruits or nak kongsi rezeki and what have you. The reason is because it is an offence under Section 137 of the Financial Services Act 2013 (''FSA 2013'') which provides as follows:

‘’ 137.   (1)   No person shall accept deposits except under a licence granted under section 10 regardless of whether the transaction is described as a loan, an advance, an investment, a savings, a sale or a sale and repurchase or by whatever name called. (2)   Any person who contravenes subsection (1) commits an offence and shall, on conviction, be liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding ten years or to a fine not exceeding fifty million ringgit or to both.’’

Since the investment sounds too good to be true, chances are it is a scam. Since it is a scam it won’t be licensed by Bank Negara Malaysia to operate. Don't fall for the line: we are in the process of applying for Bank Negara license. No license, no authorized to accept deposit. That simple. Since the purported investment is not licensed anybody accepting deposits on behalf of the so called investment is open to prosecution under the above mentioned Section 137 of FSA 2013.

Alternatively, should you have made the unwise decision to collect deposits for the scam you can also be prosecuted for cheating and dishonestly inducing delivery of property under Section 420 of the Penal Code which provides as follows:

‘’ Cheating and dishonestly inducing delivery of property

420. Whoever cheats and thereby dishonestly induces the person deceived, whether or not the deception practised was the sole or main inducement, to deliver any property to any person, or to make, alter, or destroy the whole or any part of a valuable security, or anything which is signed or sealed, and which is capable of being converted into a valuable security, shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which shall not be less than one year and not more than ten years and with whipping, and shall also be liable to fine.’’

As for the civil side of things, in most civil suit for investment scams, the pissed off downlines will go after their uplines or the ones who talked them into joining the scam most of the time. Having the scamming entity as a Defendant was almost unheard of. At least for me. So, most of the time the upline/recruiter will be the one having to compensate the downlines for their loss while the actual mastermind makes a clean getaway. Don’t let yourself be the patsy. Rein in that greed. Keep your hands off other people’s money/life savings.

Are the losses recoverable?

Not really. You can initiate legal suit in court to recover the losses but unless you drag in the scam company (if it is a registered company in Malaysia but that is highly unlikely. Some I have encountered are based in China or non-existent) I would say there is very little chance of recovering your losses either from the scam company, entity or from the scum sorry scam agent you once called nephew or niece. Most of the time the money collected had already been spent on God knows what. If you are unlucky, the money might still be there but will be forever beyond your reach because it is forfeited by the Government as proceeds of illegal activities. But, no harm in trying though. Who knows, you might be lucky to recover your loss. 

What about the Police, can’t they help me get back my money?

Unfortunately, the police and the criminal courts are not your debt collectors. They investigate, prosecute and punish scammers. Under no circumstances will they recover your money lost in investment scams for you hence my plea to only invest what you are willing to lose if you are really keen on investing.  

In the end

These investment scams prey on the financially illiterate and feeds on blind hope or greed of the victims. Financial education is a must as much as a healthy dollop of skepticism when it comes to parting with your hard earned money. Be vigilant. 

 

 

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On CPD, Learning and the absurdity of trying to force learning on the unwilling

Those who know me would know how I honour and respect learning in its every form. But the CPD scheme, Man. CPD Scheme just grinds my gears. They piss me off. During the last AGM there was a resolution to start enforcing the collection of COD points. Failure to collect CPD points within the set period will result in fine being imposed. I was fuming when I read that email update. 

How on God’s green earth are BC going to enforce the damned thing when you cannot even stamp out touting in courts, in KL Court at the very least.

Perhaps I am lamenting a done deal (I was there, years ago when it came to pass) but regardless it must be said that the implementation of CPD itself is not equal, there are two classes of practitioners according to the CPD guide. So whatever happened to Section 35(1) LPA? A case of some practitioner more equal than others? Seniority and health conditions ought not to be the dividing line between practitioners. The law and its practice changes from time to time and it affects all practitioners regardless of seniority or health conditions. Either it applies to all practitioner or it applies to none. Don’t talk about lofty ideals like equality high up in the clouds, live them down here in the muds like the rest of us. Its all or none. There is no in between. 

If the enforcement is meant to force learning on practitioners, then there is a danger that its sparks the race to collect points, not to learn. Learning ought be from one's own volition. There is no learning of what you think you already know. Let Nature take its course. Those who are not willing to learn and keep themselves up to date will stagnant and lose their value and appeal to their clients. Their ego will be their own undoing.They will be culled as a matter of course. 

Instead of punishments for lack of necessary points, incentivize the collection of points. Give meaning to the collection of points. Right now there is no meaning to the collection of points. All i gather is that if you do not have enough, you will be penalized by way of fines (as per the motion passed recently) that is when the LPA is amended. Points does not give you discounts on the sijil annual or Bar dues, it does not convert into petrol money ala Mesra card or Setel. So what does the points signify? Really.

Times are hard. Tap into this. The CPD points does not have to be convertible to cash, just make things easier for practitioner especially younger practitioners. Maybe, points could be used to obtain discount on legal texts. Even the most reluctant, book-shy practitioner will have to crack open a book at some point in their practicing life. Incentivize that. Maybe the points could be used to obtain a discount on their yearly dues. Or perhaps, the points could be carried over as Mesra or Setel points. Days of cheap fuel are long over. Point is, give meaning to the CPD points. Use it to make life easier for practitioners. Then, the accumulation of points will be a natural thing to do for a practitioner. 

Speaking of touting and CPD points, BC has ineffective in combating touting. That is a fact. But a fact that can be changed. I say set a lawyer practicing criminal law to catch a tout. These lawyers knew the touts, knew the lawyers that relies on these touts. So lets clear the corridors. Make the Criminal Bar to be self-policing, self-regulating by providing them with the motive to do so. The days of touts running wild in the court are over. They should be over.  To do so, one must incentivize these lawyers. Let then this self-policing, these rukun tetangga like activity be CPD point worthy. Hell, call it bounty hunting if you have to. Perhaps, this is the way. 

In the same vein, list doing YBGK work as one of the activities that generates CPD points. In the CPD Guidelines, attending Part 1 and 2 of the YBGK training only earns your 5 CPD point for your entire practicing life. Well, what about actively doing YBGK work then? As an aside, the minimum 1 year of practice requirement for young lawyers to attend the Part 1 and Part 2 YBGK training is nonsense. The whole idea is to train the attendees to do YBGK work regardless of years of practice. You want the young to learn and contribute and then you gatekeep the damned thing. Ridiculous.

Leaving aside the Remand, Reduction of Bail and Mitigation work, God knows there are YBGK files waiting to be adopted. Give hungry young lawyers the chance to work the files. Further, if doing YBGK work is listed as activities that gives one CPD point (preferably more) then perhaps there won’t be any issues of unadopted YBGK files since in racing to collect CPD points practitioners would fight for the right to be assigned YBGK files. With more lawyers doing YBGK work, hopefully more funds will be allocated to allow for timely payment of claims and improve YBGK training. The unrepresented is represented, the lawyer gets CPD points and some money from the YBGK files. Now you kill two, nay three birds with one stone.

Incentive is not a dirty word. Love it. Use it. 

Practitioners need to be knowledgeable and learned. I get it. Just I get it when there is no forcing an unwilling mind. There are times for the application of the cudgel to a particular problem but not every time and to every problem. Sometimes the way of the Carrot can be superior than a wielded cudgel.  

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Apa Cerita?

Dah lama anak-anak aku tak minta dibacakan cerita sebelum tidur pasal mereka dah makin membesar. Jadi terkejut juga bila satu malam yang paling sulung cakap: Abah, can you tell me a story?

Lalu aku pun bagi condensed version Sinbad the Sailor dari apa yang aku ingat pasal malas nak pegi cari bukunya dekat mana. Tak sampai 10 minit terus senyap semua tertidur. Mungkin aku patut buka channel YouTube membaca hikayat-hikayat lama untuk mereka yang mempunyai masalah untuk tidur. Silap haribulan aku sekali tertidur.

Aku dibesarkan dalam keluarga yang terpesona dengan cerita. Mak dan Abah memang kuat membaca. Bermacam buku dan majalah ada di rumah. Pelbagai majalah termasuk majalah memasak, jurnal National Geographic, buku-buku paperback abah, ensiklopedia yang Mak dapat dari entah mana. Tak cukup nak buat perpustakaan tapi cukup banyak untuk sebuah keluarga kecil. Ada sekali tu pulak Mak bawak balik satu ikat besar majalah ketenteraan pasal dia tahu aku suka benda sebegitu. Mana dia dapat pun tak tau. Senyum melebar aku. Mereka (Mak & Abah) pun rajin membelikan kami adik beradik buku-buku cerita dari kecil lagi demi mengalakkan kami membaca. Abah pula memang kaki bercerita. Ada sahaja cerita dia dari bagaimana Ammonia disintesis pada zaman dahulu kala, kenapa Ikan Jelawat di panggil Sultanfish dalam Bahasa Inggeris dan cerita-cerita hantu dia. Dengan suasana sedemikian kami adik beradik sedikit sebanyak mempunyai appreciation kepada cerita yang bagus. Jadi tidak menghairankan kenapa kami bertiga kini berada dalam bidang yang masing-masing memerlukan sedikit sebanyak penceritaan dalam melaksanakan tugas masing-masing.

Cerita pasal cerita dan penceritaan, dulu waktu masa baru masuk sekolah menengah aku jumpa satu salinan VCD filem Amistad di rumah nenek. Kualiti memang hampeh. Siap boleh ada satu part tu kamera tersenget dan ada tangan yang tegakkan kembali. Bunyi bergaung. Memang terang-terang copy dari panggung wayang.

Pada waktu itu jalan cerita pun faham sikit-sikit. Ada sekumpulan orang Afrika yang diculik dari benua Afrika kemudian di bawa berlayar ke Dunia Baru untuk dijadikan hamba. Mereka melepaskan diri dan membunuh sebahagian daripada anak kapal dan mengambil alih kapal. Tau-tau je ada di Amerika, di bawa ke mahkamah. Dituduh membunuh tapi lepas kerana kejadian diluar perairan Amerika Syarikat. Kemudian dibawa pula ke mahkamah sivil hingga ke Mahkamah Agung dimana persoalan yang timbul adalah sama ada mereka orang bebas atau hamba yang mana milikannya dipertikaikan kerana ada tuntutan bertindan. Pemilik kapal Amistad pun tuntut, kapten kapal Revenue yang menawan kembali kapal dalam perairan Amerika Syarikat juga menuntut. Salvage katanya.

Watak peguam yang dimainkan Matthew McConaughey yang nama dia aku tak ingat diupah oleh orang-orang kuat persatuan anti perhambaan bagi mewakili kumpulan orang Afrika tersebut. Cemana dia wakil pun tak tau lah pasal nak bercakap dengan anak guam pun serupa ayam dengan itik. Di mahkamah jenayah lepas. Mahkamah rendah sivil pun lepas. Tapi bila masuk ke Mahkamah Agung dia pun angkat tangan menyerah, kena cari big gun. Di sini masuknya John Quincy Adams yang dimainkan oleh Sir Anthony Hopkins.

Antara benda pertama yang dikatakan oleh John Quincy Adams adalah seperti berikut:

John Quincy Adams: Well, when I was an attorney, a long time ago, young man, I err… I realized, after much trial and error, that in the courtroom, whoever tells the best story wins. In un-lawyerlike fashion, I give you that scrap of wisdom free of charge.

Pada waktu itu aku memang tak ambil tahu pasal amalan undang-undang atau pun bermimpi akan jadi pengamal. Aku dengar dialog di atas dan terus aku duduk tegak dari sebelumnya duduk bersandar malas.

Interesting.

Lepas dialog tersebut, babak ini pula yang buat aku terpana, melopong:

John Quincy Adams: What is their story, by the way?

Theodore Joadson: Sir?

John Quincy Adams: What is their story?

Theodore Joadson: Why, they’re um… they’re from west Africa.

John Quincy Adams: No. What is their story?

Theodore Joadson: [exhales and looks confused]

John Quincy Adams: Mr. Joadson, you’re from where originally?

Theodore Joadson: Why, Georgia, sir.

John Quincy Adams: Georgia.

Theodore Joadson: Yes, sir.

John Quincy Adams: Does that pretty much sum up what you are? A Georgian? Is that your story? No you’re an ex-slave whose devoted his life to the abolition of slavery, and overcoming the obstacles and hardships along the way, I should imagine. That’s your story, isn’t it?

Theodore Joadson: [smiles and nods]

John Quincy Adams: [laughs] You and this young so-called lawyer have proven you know what they are. They’re Africans. Congratulations. What you don’t know, and as far as I can tell haven’t bothered in the least to discover, is who they are. Right?

Perbualan ini membuatkan sesuatu dalam kepala aku click. Something fell into place. Stories do have power. Butiran lain film Amistad ini aku tak ingat tapi dialog ini memang aku ingat. Aku cari dan tengok balik Amistad kerana dialog ini. Tentang pentingnya cerita.

Babak John Quicy Adams berhujah dihadapan panel hakim Mahkamah Agung bagaimana perjuangan yang masih belum selesai American Revolution adalah perang bagi memastikan kesaksamaan semua manusia sepertimana ditulis dalam Declaration of Independence, John C. Calhoun buat ugutan nak berperang semata mengekalkan sistem perhambaan, mungkin betul, boleh jadi juga tak berapa nak tepat. Sama seperti babak salah seorang warga Afrika yang terperangkap di atas La Amistad, Cinque yang melaung berulang kali give us us free dari kandang pesalah. Tapi, itu yang membuatkan penceritaan itu menjadi menarik, kalau pun sama ada benar-benar terjadi atau tak itu sesuatu yang boleh dipersoalkan.

Kalau dalam satu cerita yang hebat boleh dikatakan aku terinspirasi untuk mengambil jurusan undang-undang dan kemudiannya mengamal kerana mendengar menonton di layar hujahan John Quincy Adams itu tapi hidup aku hidup biasa bukan produksi Hollywood. Mana pulak dramatik. Aku belajar undang-undang pasal mak aku suruh. Aku jadi peguam pasal itu apa yang diharapkan, natural progression of things.

Nampak tak? semuanya bergantung kepada macam mana kau menyampaikan cerita. Kena ada sedikit element nasik tambah dan rencah. Those Hollywood embellishments. Tapi kalau kau nak letak adegan tari menari pun tak salah. Ikut target audience.

Ambil satu lagi contoh dari filem. Kali ini filem Tim Burton berjudul Big Fish. Tim Burton ini banyak bikin filem-filem yang fantastical, whimsical dan outlandish seperti Edward Scissorhands, The Nightmare before Christmas, Corpse Bride, Batman yang ada Jack Nicholson memainkan watak Joker, Batman Returns yang ada Michelle Pfeiffer melakonkan watak Catwoman. Itu yang aku ingat.

Big Fish ini berkenaan seorang anak lelaki dan bapaknya yang suka sembang kencang. Telling tall tales. Berkawan dengan gergasi lah, dikejar nenek kebayan lah, selamatkan kembar siam sewaktu Perang Korea lah, kerja di sarkaslah, jumpa pekan pelik ditengah hutan lah hinggakan anak dia naik menyampah dan membesar dengan menjauhkan diri dari bapanya. Bila dah besar pula jadi wartawan mengejar cerita betul dan bukan mengada-adakan cerita macam bapaknya.

Bila bapanya itu jatuh sakit, si anak itu membuat keputusan untuk menyiasat betul ke tidak cerita-cerita bapaknya itu. Sikit demi sedikit dia sedar yang bapaknya sembang tak sekencang yang dia sangka. Bila bapaknya meninggal dunia hampir semua watak-watak dalam cerita bapaknya itu datang ke upacara pengebumian. Ringmaster sarkas, si kembar yang bukan siam, si gergasi.

Boleh jadi filem ini adalah gentle reminder kepada para bapak untuk jangan sembang kencang sangat. Sikit-sikit takpe. Mungkin juga apa yang nak disampaikan adalah kadang-kadang cerita yang kita anggap merepek itu adalah satu kebenaran yang ditokoktambah dan disusun atur semula urutannya.

Cerita pasal urutan. Tak kisah cerita zaman mana atau medium apa pun yang kau baca atau tengok atau main, urutannya akan lebih kurang sama. Ada watak utama dan sesuatu berlaku pada watak utama. Benda yang berlaku itu membuatkan watak utama berbuat sesuatu tak kiralah mencari sesuatu atau seseorang dan sewaktu pencarian itu berlaku akan ada watak sampingan yang masuk cerita. Boleh jadi love interest. Boleh jadi figura mentor. Boleh jadi sidekick, atau watak badut. Watak antagonis juga diperkenalkan untuk menghalang pencarian atau pun dia pun turut sama mencari benda/orang sama yang dicari watak utama. Kemuncak pencarian tersebut akan mengubah karakter dan persepsi watak utama hinggakan dia tidak dapat kembali kepada kehidupan lama kerana beliau bukan orang yang sama pada permulaan cerita. Itu adalah asas kepada sesebuah cerita setakat yang aku ingat dari pembelajaran aku.

Kalau dalam Mahkamah, aku rasa contoh paling mudah untuk menggunapakai teknik penceritaan adalah sewaktu mitigasi bagi mengurangkan hukuman kes jenayah. Mahkamah anggap cerita OKT dah separuh jalan pasal dah ada nombor kes, dah ada pertuduhan bermaksud dah ada (sedikit sebanyak) penyiasatan dan OKT sudah mengaku bersalah. Perkara yang mengubah hidup Watak Utama dah terjadi pun. Hidup dia takkan sama seperti dulu.

Tugas peguam yang membuat mitigasi adalah untuk bercerita tentang OKT sebelum dan sewaktu pengakuan salah direkodkan. Dah kahwin ke, bakal berkahwin ke. Anak berapa, kerja kat mana. Mak Bapak ada lagi ke tidak. Lepas tu kaitkan dengan kesalahan yang dah dibuat. Sudah tentu kena cakap tentang pengakuan salah telah menjimatkan masa dan kos mahkamah. Cerita juga tentang tempoh masa reman. Dari pemerhatian aku, selalunya tempoh reman ini akan dikaitkan dengan masa untuk merenung kembali (aku suka guna terma muhasabah diri) dan menyesali perbuatan yang telah dilakukan. Kalau OKT berbangsa melayu dan Hari Raya bakal menjelang tiba, kaitkan dengan kenapa denda perlu minimum (hukum OKT, bukan hukum anak OKT sampai tak ada baju raya), kalau baru mula bulan Ramadan kaitkan bulan keampunan dengan keampunan dari Mahkamah demi meringankan hukuman. Kalau OKT berbangsa India, dan ada perayaan yang disambut bangsa India dalam tempoh masa terdekat gunakan. Hujahkan kenapa penjara bukan hukuman paling sesuai (OKT anak seorang, jangan hukum Mak Bapak untuk Deepavali, Vaisakhi) dan seterusnya bagi lain-lain kaum. Tengok OKT betul-betul. Kalau tempang tanya kenapa. Kalau gigi semua luruh tanya kenapa dan gunakan sebagai sebab untuk mengurangkan hukuman. Mitigasi adalah peluang untuk jadi tukang cerita yang kreatif menampilkan cerita bagi menarik kepada rasional dan juga emosi Hakim. Hakim atau Majistret hari-hari (kecuali cuti umum) dengar Rayuan mengurangkan hukuman yang sambil lewa maka tak mengejutkan kalau dia pun dah jadi lali. Jadi lain daripada yang lain. Tarik perhatian. Tell a damn good story.

Itu kalau mitigasi. Kalau bicara pula lain cerita. Panjang cerita. Banyak persediaan yang perlu dibuat. Jangan tertipu dengan lagak tenang Harvey Specter et al. Pejabat kemas licin tak ada fail pastu bawak bawa bicara kes tak tengok fail.

Anyway, ada banyak buku yang lagi cekap menerangkan penceritaan sewaktu perbicaraan. Salah satunya, The Malaysian Guide to Advocacy. Ada banyak lagi buku dalam list suggested readings dia. Paling pendek dan kegemaran aku: The Golden Rules of Advocacy, Keith Evans.

Tapi, untuk dipendekkan cerita, anologi yang boleh digunakan adalah sewaktu perbicaraan peguam adalah direktor filem yang menyampaikan cerita melalui saksi-saksi dan bukti-bukti yang dikumpul dan soal balas saksi lawan/pendakwaan dan berlandaskan kepada kaedah-kaedah prosedur dan keterangan. Cuma kau tak boleh sambil artistic license dengan kebenaran (the whole truth and nothing but the truth) dan adegan tari-menari adalah sangat tidak digalakkan.

Bila dah habis perbicaraan dan masuk fasa hujahan bertulis itu yang betul-betul ada peluang untuk peguam bercerita kenapa kes beliau lagi bermerit dari kes lawan. Kebiasaannya apa yang berlaku adalah ianya akan jadi arms race. Semua nak buat hujahan sepanjang mungkin, Ikatan Autoriti setebal mungkin. Kalau boleh nak lagi tebal dari Lloyd’s Introduction to Jurisprudence. Semua kes kau nak letak. Gila. Susah nak bind Ikatan Autoriti yang tebal-tebal ni. Kebas tangan guna mesin binding.

Pengamal veteran dan bekas-bekas hakim ada menceritakan tentang waktu dahulu yang ada cuma Hujahan Lisan dan tak ada Ikatan Autoriti ni. Hanya ada bakul autoriti pasal tak ada mesin fotostat dan printer saiz kecil pun belum ada zaman tu. Sekarang Hujahan Lisan ini banyak dibuat di Mahkamah Rayuan dan Mahkamah Persekutuan. Kalau ada peringkat Mahkamah Tinggi pun macam tak banyak. Di Mahkamah Rendah langsung lenyap amalan ini. Patutnya dihidupkan kembali. Jimat kertas dan boleh berpotensi pendekkan masa prosiding dan sekali gus selaras dengan polisi mengejar KPI.

Mengamal undang-undang ini adalah memainkan peranan sebagai tukang cerita bagi anak guam. Bercerita dan bergelumang dengan segala macam jenis cerita. Ada aku ternampak di LinkedIn itu hari ada yang mencadangkan untuk ada penceritaan dalam mendraf kontrak. Katanya cerita tentang pihak-pihak dan apa yang pihak-pihak harapkan dari kontrak tersebut. Aku termenung juga fikir macam mana nak bercerita dalam kontrak tapi aku rasa macam boleh dibuat. Undang-undang ini berkisar tentang menyusun atur hidup manusia dalam masyarakat. Macam mana boleh jadi di anggap dry subject pun aku tak tau. Hidup manusia ni mana pernah dry. Ada duka, ada jenaka. Ada juga tak masuk akal kadang-kadang.  Hidup kita ini adalah cerita. Kalau kau bernasib baik kau jadi mitos.

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The Paratrooper's Prayer

Aku tak berapa pandai untuk menilai dan menikmati puisi. Ada cuba tapi mungkin aku belum cukup cultured lagi. Mungkin perlu mendalami lagi kerja-kerja pemuisi dahulu kala. 

Dalam Call Sign Chaos, Jim Mattis ada merujuk kepada The Paratrooper's Prayer. Ini yang seronok baca buku bukan fiksyen, bibiliografi yang memberikan kau lagi banyak buku dan bahan lain untuk kau baca. The Paratrooper's Prayer ini ditulis oleh Andre Zirnheld iaitu seorang profesor falsafah dan kemudiannya anggota pasukan payung terjun bersama Free French Air Force sewaktu Perang Dunia Kedua. Beliau meninggal dunia selepas menyertai serangan SAS (Special Air Service) ke atas lapangan terbang tentera Jerman di Sidi Haneish di mana SAS dengan menggunapakai 18 buah jip bermesingan menjahanamkan 37 pesawat tentera Jerman pada waktu itu.

Sekali aku baca The Paratrooper's Prayer terus aku minat. The Paratrooper's Prayer ini bagi aku menarik kerana ianya satu bentuk doa atau juga boleh jadi satu puisi yang menyuntik semangat. Ikut kau nak pilih yang mana. Yang penting, ianya bagi aku satu doa/puisi yang lain daripada lain kerana nadanya yang sangat merendah diri dan berserah tapi pada masa yang sama, defiant. Itu membuatkannya ianya relatable, terutamanya kepada pengamal undang-undang yang mengamal di dalam firma sendiri yang bagi aku, berani dan cekal. Semoga kalian kekal berani dan cekal. Semoga kalian dapat mendaratkan kes sebesar paus lagenda dalam hayat kalian.

Semoga kalian kekal defiant. 

 

La Prière du Para

Je m'adresse à vous, mon Dieu, car vous donnez

Ce qu'on ne peut obtenir que de soi

Donnez-moi, mon Dieu, ce qui vous reste

Donnez-moi ce qu'on ne vous demande jamais.

 

Je ne vous demande pas le repos

Ni la tranquillité

Ni celle de l'âme, ni celle du corps.

Je ne vous demande pas la richesse

Ni le succès, ni même la santé.

 

Tout ça, mon Dieu, on vous le demande tellement

Que vous ne devez plus en avoir.

Donnez-moi, mon Dieu, ce qui vous reste

Donnez-moi ce que l'on vous refuse.

 

Je veux l'insécurité et l'inquiétude.

Je veux la tourmente et la bagarre

Et que vous me les donniez, mon Dieu, définitivement.

Que je sois sûr de les avoir toujours

Car je n'aurai pas toujours le courage

De vous les demander.

 

Donnez-moi, mon Dieu, ce qui vous reste.

Donnez-moi ce dont les autres ne veulent pas.

Mais donnez-moi aussi le courage

Et la force et la foi.

Car vous seul donnez, mon Dieu,

Ce que l'on ne peut attendre que de soi.

 

 

Prayer of the Paratrooper

Give me, O Lord, what remains Thine;

What no one ever asks of Thee.

I do not ask Thee for rest

Nor tranquility,

Neither of the soul nor of the body.

I do not ask Thee for riches,

Nor success,

Nor even health.

So many ask you for these, O Lord,

Thou shouldst no longer have anything left to give.

Give me Lord, what remains Thine.

Give me that which all of us refuse.

I want insecurity and restlessness,

I want struggle and trouble.

And grant them to me, My Lord, forever.

Make sure that I will always take them

Because I will not always have the courage

To ask of Thee for them.

Give me, O Lord, what remains Thine,

Give me what others do not want;

But give me also the Courage,

And the Strength,

And the Faith.

Amen.

 

 

 

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Do you believe in Magic?

In Malaysia for all the trappings of modern life we remain a society deeply rooted in the belief of the unseen. The supernatural, the tahayul. Magic they call it.  This belief cuts across racial lines and class divide. Everyone from desperate housewives to politicians needs someone who can manipulate or at least, bargain with the unseen. Everyone needs a friend from the other side. 

Sendings of harm be it be it by air or by intermediaries so that you vomit blood and nails, suffer and later die. Love potions to make someone fall in love with you unwillingly. Or spells to drain love and invite strife, to clove husband and wife apart. Low magic.

Or hexes and mantras to command obedience and mute subservience. Doings and rituals to attract custom to one’s business, or to bring down a rival’s. Summoning djinns or elementals to unearth treasure trove from the bottom of the sea or river, or tangkals and talisman for proof from harm be it earthly or otherwise. Low Magic.

Unholy, misguided missals to blind eyes, deafen ears and stiffen tongues to distort Truth and imbalance the scales of Justice. Low magic.

Low magic. Black Magic. They are all low magic, black magic for they feed on our baser needs and wants. Lust, malice, jealousy and desire for power, drawing from fears of the past and worries of the future. The blacker they are all the more potent they will be. Perhaps that is why spiritual intermediaries are needed. There is only so much negativity one person can hold on to at any given time.

Not for me. All these use of intermediaries. These low magic stuff. Not that I do not believe in them, they exist. That much I do know. Just that I have no need for them. 

As in shoes, one must be discerning in the kind of magic one relies on.

The greatest magic comes from the unlikeliest sources. The three words lovers whispered to each other. The lightest touch from our wife or husband at time of turmoil and trouble. The sight of a bright clear sky in the morning. The smell of grass and earth after a good long rain. The whispering breeze through the leaves. The gurgling laughter of a baby. The hug from our growing child. The tearful thank you from a grateful client. The satisfaction of a job well done. The smell of our mother’s home cooked meal. The pat on the head by our dear father when we were kids. Words of encouragement and reassurance from persons of high regard in times  of confusion. The unlooked for helping hand when you are in need. A willing pair of ears when hearing is called for. These are what I call high magic. Real magic. The everyday kind. They come unbidden from deep well spring of our soul. They keep you grounded in the present. They keep you going. They give momentum to your movement. They keep you sane. They keep safe your belief in humanity. They etch a smile on your face and give warmth in your heart. 

That’s magic for me. No pulut kuning involved.

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On Secrets.

 

Satu benda yang aku seronok bila berada di rumah Nenek waktu dahulu adalah jenis bahan bacaan yang ada. Dari akhbar-akhbar seperti Harakah, Utusan dan lain-lain, majalah gosip artis (URTV, Mangga dan lain-lain), publikasi-publikasi sensasi dan mistik seperti Variasari dan Mastika, buku-buku dalam Siri Bercakap Dengan Jin, buku-buku dan risalah HarunYahya, novel-novel Michael Crichton dan John Grisham yang datang entah dari mana, jilid-jilid ensiklopedia leather bound yang diterbitkan sekitar tahun 70-an, manual-manual perkomputeran, buku perbandingan agama. Pendek cerita, ada sahaja bahan bacaan yang boleh kau baca. Yang tak ada cuma komik dan novel grafik.  

Aku tak ingat bila tapi ada satu hari ada orang bawa pulang ke rumah Nenek buku-buku untuk kanak-kanak. Salah satunya adalah koleksi cerita rakyat dari Asia Tenggara. Banyak cerita dalam buku tersebut tetapi yang aku betul-betul ingat adalah satu cerita rakyat dari Burma.

Secara ringkasnya pada suatu hari raja yang kebetulan kebosanan berjalan-jalan ke sekeliling istana ditemani oleh perdana menteri. Rayau punya rayau sampai ke bahagian kandang ternakan istana Raja terpana melihat itik-itik makan lalu ditanyakan kepada perdana Menteri. Itik-itik ini makan apa? Berselera sungguh nampaknya. Perdana Menteri pun maklum pada raja, itik makan dedak, Tuanku. Raja pula kata bagi sikit, nak cuba dedak. Perdana Menteri pun balas, Tuanku lapar? Jom kita pegi makan. Banyak lagi makanan yang jauh lagi enak boleh Tuanku makan. Raja berkeras nak cuba dedak juga. Nak dipanggil dayang untuk ambil mangkuk segala bagai takut jadi bualan Istana pulak. Jadi mahu tak mahu, perdana Menteri pun seluk tangan dalam guni dedak dan beri pada raja. Raja pulak ambil secubit dan rasa. Sedap, kata dia. Dia ambik sendiri dedak dari guni dan makan dan makan sehingga puas. Bila dah puas baru dia teringat yang dia raja dan bukannya itik lalu dititahkan kepada Perdana Menteri jangan diberitahu pada sesiapa yang raja makan dedak. Perdana Menteri pula kerana titah raja dia pun buat senyap perkara tersebut sedangkan dalam hati rasa bersalah kerana bagi raja makan dedak dan pada masa yang sama nak gelak besar mengenangkan raja yang makan dedak sehinggakan perdana Menteri tak lalu makan, tidur tak nyenyak, hidup tak tenang kerana menyimpan perkara ini seorang diri.

Bila tak tertahan-tahan lagi perdana menteri pegi berjalan ke dalam hutan seorang diri, ingatnya nak dijerit sekuat-kuatnya rahsia yang disimpan tapi takut pula didengar pemburu atau pengutip hasil hutan. Jalan lagi hingga lah terjumpa satu pokok jati besar yang mempunyai lubang besar dibatangnya. Perdana menteri pun terinspirasi untuk melepaskan rahsia yang dibawanya di situ lalu beliau pun dengan nada yang tinggi berteriak dalam lubang tersebut: raja makan dedak!. Setelah itu perdana menteri pun pulang ke rumah. Selera makan datang kembali, tidur pun kembali nyenyak. Tenang jiwa dan raga perdana menteri.  Rahsia raja pun kekal rahsia.

Selang beberapa tahun raja yang sama bertitah agar satu gong baru untuk balairung istana dibuat untuk merayakan keputraan Putera raja. Gong besar dibuat oleh pandai besi dan kayu pula dibuat dari kayu jati yang paling kuat di cari khas dari dalam hutan bagi menampung berat gong besar.

Bila tiba masa untuk raja merasmikan majlis raja pun memukul gong dan keluarlah bunyi suara perdana menteri berteriak:

Raja makan dedak!

 

berulang-ulang.

 

Waktu kecil dahulu aku terkekek-kekek gelak bila baca pengakhiran cerita sebegitu tapi bila dah besar ni barulah faham apa moralnya. Rahsia kena kekal rahsia hingga dibenar untuk dilepaskan kerahsiaannya oleh yang tuan punya badan dan banyak lubang dalam dunia ini yang memudaratkan apatah lagi lubang pokok ditengah hutan.

Sekarang ini bila menaip balik cerita ini aku terfikir, wow, mungkin gong tersebut adalah satu spesis Fonograph yang terawal. Fonograf terawal menggunapakai prinsip getaran untuk jarum merekodkan bunyi di atas silinder lilin yang diputarkan dengan tangan. Mungkin kayu jati pun mempunyai kebolehan yang sama tapi lebih au naturale. Mungkin lah. Aku memandai je ni. (Rujuk: Stone Tape Theory. Kalau nak terkekek-kekek gelak, rujuk: Stoned Ape Theory).

Aku cerita tentang rahsia kerana baru lepas tengok filem Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy dua hari lepas. Filem spy thriller mengenai cubaan untuk membongkar pembelot dalam perkhidmatan risikan British era lewat 60-an yang memberikan rahsia-rahsia kerajaan kepada Kesatuan Soviet. All star cast, Gary Oldman, Tom Hardy dan beberapa lagi. Boleh tahan syiok jugak la.

Berfikir berkenaan dua cerita ini membuatkan aku berfikir lagi mengenai rahsia dan kerahsiaan. Knowledge is power atau terjemahan kasarnya pengetahuan adalah kuasa dan yang paling berkuasa adalah yang merahsiakan pengetahuannya sehingga masanya untuk digunapakai. Itu bagi aku adalah esen kepada spy business.

Kalau sudah berkahwin pula berkongsi pula bukan setakat berkongsi hidup. Malahan berkongsi rahsia. Itu adalah realiti hidup berkahwin. Bila dengan kawan karib kau yang juga teman hidup kau semua kau luahkan, semua kau cerita (aku rasa lah). Undang-undang mengambil kira dan menghormati faktor ini. Oleh sebab itu Seksyen 122 Akta Keterangan 1950 menyatakan seperti berikut:

‘’122  Communications during marriage

No person who is or has been married shall be compelled to disclose any communication made to him during marriage by any person to whom he is or has been married; nor shall he be permitted to disclose any such communication unless the person who made it or his representative in interest consents, except in suits between married persons or proceedings in which one married person is prosecuted for any crime committed against the other.’’(penekanan ditambah)

Bila mengamal pula banyak benda yang kita dengar dari anak guam jika didedahkan pada telinga yang tak patut boleh memudaratkan kes dan juga reputasi anak guam dan juga reputasi pengamal itu sendiri. Sebab itu komunikasi di antara peguam dan anak guam itu adalah dirahsiakan.

Seksyen 126 Akta Keterangan 1950 mengambil kira perkara ini dan menyatakan seperti berikut:

 

‘’ 126  Professional communications

(1) No advocate shall at any time be permitted, unless with his client's express consent, to disclose any communication made to him in the course and for the purpose of his employment as such advocate by or on behalf of his client, or to state the contents or condition of any document with which he has become acquainted in the course and for the purpose of his professional employment, or to disclose any advice given by him to his client in the course and for the purpose of such employment:

 

Provided that nothing in this section shall protect from disclosure-

 

(a) any such communication made in furtherance of any illegal purpose;

 

(b) any fact observed by any advocate in the course of his employment as such showing that any crime or fraud has been committed since the commencement of his employment.

 

(2) It is immaterial whether the attention of the advocate was or was not directed to the fact by or on behalf of his client.’’(penekanan ditambah)

Sebenarnya banyak soalan yang terbit dalam otak aku pasal kerahsiaan antara peguam dan anak guam atau attorney-client privilege ini yang perlu dirujuk kepada yang lebih ahli dan perlu di research. Yang pasti, macam komunikasi suami isteri, komunikasi peguam dan anak guam juga adalah sulit dan dilindungi. Tapi siapa yang sejujurnya betul-betul ikut?. Jangan angkat tangan, jawab dalam hati. Itu antara kau dengan anak guam kau dan DB kalau dah langgar Rule 35, Legal Profession (Practice and Etiquette) Rules 1978.

Yang pastinya privilege itu tidak absolute. Seksyen 122 ada bagi pengecualian, sama juga dengan Seksyen 126. Kalau berkenaan attorney-client privilege kes yang famousnya adalah Re the Detention of Leonard Teoh Hooi Leong [1998] 1 MLJ 757 yang juga famous sebab melibatkan isu Murtad. Ada rasanya lagi kes privilege yang lagi terbaru tapi ini yang aku betul-betul ingat.

Satu benda yang aku hairan adalah peguam ada codified hak attorney-client privilege itu tapi bagi doctor yang juga dalam jurusan professional, aku cuma jumpa guideline Malaysia Medical Council berkenaan menjaga kerahsiaan pesakit itu. Mungkin kerana Sumpah Hipokratik sedikit sebanyak menjaga perkara tersebut (Do no harm to the patient). Cerita berkenaan sumpah dan ritual dalam jurusan undang-undang ini juga satu lagi perkara menarik untuk disembangkan. Nantilah bila aku ada masa.

Anyway,

Bagi aku penyataan Knowledge is power itu tidak lengkap. Bagi aku penyataan yang lengkap adalah; Knowledge is Power and Power, is Responsibility.

Boleh jadi itu sebabnya kenapa ada client-attorney privilege. Boleh jadi itu juga adalah sebab yang sama kehidupan seorang pengamal itu dibatasi dengan peraturan-peraturan etika. Kerana pengetahuan undang-undang adalah tanggungjawab dan mengamal undang-undang itu berat tanggungjawabnya. Seberat menanggung rahsia raja yang makan dedak.

 

 

 

 

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